seamstress with a penis

quick note

2009-01-25T19:54:00.003-05:00

new stencil i designed last night (have yet to cut it though):

i wanted to do dropshadowing but the finished thing is only 5" square so that doesn't leave a lot of room for shadowing or fancy things like that (not on cloth, anyways).

tips for making your own

2009-01-20T16:42:00.002-05:00

gonna make a post on how to make your own stencils soon (read: when things get a little less hectic) but for now, i've been finding out some really interesting things with spraypaints and different textiles/material.

basically,

flat spraypaint is GREAT for tightly-knit, semi-waterproofed material like canvas. it soaks in and holds detail VERY well.

however, glossy spraypaint works MUCHHH better for polyester, or porous material (such as polo shirts).

t-shirts can use either. you get a crisper image with glossy on t-shirts, but flat holds the colour a LOT better.

that's all for now :)

slow and steady... well, just pisses people off

2009-01-19T20:10:00.003-05:00

i've been taking SO LONG with katie's jacket. i've not been sleeping well and can't focus at all (more on that on the other blog if you're interested), so my sewing is really suffering.

i hope to have it mailed by friday. i have a party thing tomorrow night and it's with a bunch of christian hippie/crustpunk/etc. kids so they won't give me odd looks when i start working on it there. :)

whooo etsy!

2009-01-18T01:55:00.002-05:00

SwaPthreads at Etsy
only have two stencils up at the moment, but will make more and do something with all these scraps over the next couple of weeks. \o/

project 2 update #3

2009-01-15T00:00:00.004-05:00

stenciled!

i might have this done in a week or two. WEWT!

NOTE: for anyone wondering, the reason it has a Rebel Alliance logo on the front and the stormtrooper "OBEY" stencil on the back is because traditionally, the "OBEY" stencils are used ironically and are decidedly anti-authoritarian.

to do:

-find out if katie likes it as-is or wants some white with that stormtrooper
-sew.. things. maybe some pink trim? not sure what i want to do with this one 100% yet

project 3:
-2 stormtrooper "OBEY" backpatches for kristin, white-on-black, tough mat'l

project 2 update #2

2009-01-14T22:28:00.002-05:00

yayyy i got the second stencil finished!

next up is the spraying and the sewing and it's done!

project 1 update

2009-01-14T20:53:00.004-05:00

she got me some photos! yayyyy!

hahaha. she's so cute.

project 2 update #1

2009-01-14T07:14:00.006-05:00

okay. so i stayed up all night (my insomnia's back! sad panda) but i got the hardest stencil DONE.

it's a bit hard to see but it's a parody of the Andre the Giant OBEY stencils. stormtroopers \o/ !

it'll (here's hoping) look better once it gets sprayed.

photo of the aftermath:

i also sanded down the jacket and broke it in (a little TOO well this time. it took too much a beating so now i need to take the extra time to reinforce some spots that are threadbare.

"i submit my incentive is romance; i watched the poledance of the stars"

2009-01-13T15:04:00.002-05:00

[ "Slow Hands" - Interpol ]

still waiting on nik for photos of her in the vest! so hopefully that'll come soon.

gonna start work on the next project, a vest for nik's friend katie.

i think this is the general timetable:

this week - purchase raw mat'ls (just the BDU shirt, i think. i also need some more manila envelopes and a printer cartridge for my printer for the stencils.. so we'll see how that goes)

next week (or maybe this week)- weathering, rip off the sleeves, start the pockets

3rd week- cut stencils, finish pockets, do belt

4th week- stencil, finishing touches, box up

off to get some materials! :)

"every girl is crazy 'bout a sharp-dressed man"

2009-01-12T17:46:00.002-05:00

[ "Sharp-Dressed Man" - ZZ Top ]

project 1 is done!

i wanted to do something special for a really dear friend of mine, nikki.
we both share an affinity for crustpunk things, and i love hobostitching[1] so i really hope she loves it.

update: SHE GOT IT AND LOVES IT! i was so excited that i got the hiccups after she hung up!! :) this was a really special project for me so i'm glad it was so well-received. she promised me photos to post here, so i'll post another entry (or just edit this one) whenever i get those.

PHOTOS

before:

during:

(ugh. so dark. i should show people where the flash is on my camera before they yoink it and snap unsuspecting photos of me :) i'd throw it in GIMP and lighten it but.. i'm too lazy. :)

before my callouses had started to develop, i had to use needlenose pliers to push/pull the needle through the material (sometimes around 5 layers thick!) and since i don't use a thimble, well.. that can get a little treacherous/painful at times without the pliers.

i may or may not have spent a lot of time on this.. :)

after/finished product:

that giant patch on the back is actually from a church i went to in lancaster, "Solace Bible Church". no, i have no idea why the skull is wearing a sombrero or kercheif, but i suspected the skull was a reference to Romans 6, and being dead to sin but alive in Christ (which is a little like the Walking Dead, if you'll pardon the analogy. only we don't want to eat your brains).

looks WAYY better with a flannel underneath in my opinion :) or a hoodie, but i digress.

the fleur-de-lis is because apparently it's HUGE in new orleans now. super popular. so yeah, i figure that'd be a pretty good "locale" statement. she does have NOLA-pride (i don't blame her!).

i also mailed her the stencils i used for it.

labours of love:

this is a showcase of various abuses, injuries, damages, what have you i encountered during the process. :)

notice the lovely blisters on my fingertips from sewing. this is what happens when i stencil. i'm so messy :)

obviously, i spray right-handed. HAH. you can also see some pretty nasty blisters and callouses forming (i sew ambidexterously, but predominantly right-handed).

this was AFTER cleaning up. it's three days later and i still have paint-stained fingers on my left hand. but huzzah for gojo/pumice!

this is so gross. i don't even know why i'm posting these, haha. more evidence of blistering/callouses. i kind of like this shot, though.

what i wanted to do but didnt:

i wanted to add some webbing (webbing is that interwoven nylon you have on the straps of backpack buckles, etc.) and add some clasps for the pockets (especially the middle ones on the front), but i ran out of time (i took too long with it as-is!) and just general-purpose ones (to hold keys, etc.).. forgot to get it while i was at the army navy surplus. :/

i wanted to write out something personal- something maybe from Proverbs or Psalms or Isaiah ;) or some poetic phrases or so forth, but then i realized two things.
1. that's something i should do to MY jacket, not hers
2. i need to provide PLENTY of space for her to "make it her own"- write her own things, stencil her own things, add her own patches, etc.

so that's why i didn't do that.

i think it'd be cool if she mailed it back once in a while (at least until i move down there! ;) new orleans is suchhh a beautiful city; i fell in love) and i can keep adding little things each time. a small stencil here, some lettering there, some straps, etc. maybe even only to the inside so i don't clutter up the outside. i dunno. :)

i also wanted to maybe monogram it or something, but i worried that'd be a bit lame.

i also wanted to sign it (since it IS a unique creation, and it's something i'm proud of) but i didn't. it's okay, i found something special to do for it instead. :)

what's next:

well, her friend katie wants a jacket now. that'll take much less time since i have a general layout in mind now and i don't have to stitch on a giant patch from a t-shirt. far less stitching on that one, actually.
she wants a stencil of the Rebel Alliance logo- i'll put that on the front (where the fleur-de-lis is). and i got a hilarious idea of doing a stormtrooper "OBEY" stencil, which will be the main piece on the back. it's a parody of the Andre the Giant OBEY stencils. it'll be fun. i'll need to think of what to do with all my left over pink fabric. i think i'll decorate the pockets. or maybe a pink faux-cravat, or something.

i also want to make one for me- my old vest is getting a little beat up and it's a little too warm for spring/summer (since it's about as twice as thick as this one; the army has different thickness BDU shirts, apparently, depending on what time period..?).

and as always, i'm open to suggestions/requests! i just need the $$ for the raw mat'ls and time. :) i may start charging labour if i get a lot of requests.

[1] hobostitching is when you handstitch something using dental floss (johnson&johnson's dentotape is by far the best for this), a needle, and not much else. dental floss is much stronger than conventional thread since it's woven nylon, and once you knot off your stitches you burn the ends to keep the knots from unraveling- it all melts together and hardens.

FAQ

2009-01-11T14:35:00.005-05:00

Q. where the heck did you get the title for this blog? psssh. you WOULD have a blog called that.

A. it's from an inside joke with extended family. it was christmas eve '08. i was working on a project for a friend when my cousin asked me, "so, what are you- a seamstress or something?" i replied "no, because I DON'T HAVE A VAGINA." she corrected herself and said tailor, but the damage was done. thus was born the blog title. :)
if you feel uncomfortable about the word "penis", you can refer to this whole shindig as S.w.a.P.

Q. you suck! you're so sloppy and messy and uncrafty, i hate you.

A. well, that's not really a question.

Q. fine. WHY do you suck so much, and why are you so sloppy and messy and uncrafty, and did you know i hate you?

A. better. i think this is largely relative. there are a lot of different methods out there; i've been drawn to a more esoteric and perhaps archaic mode of sewing- hobostitching. the sloppiness and messiness and uncraftiness are all intentional; i could use a machine and regular thread and make perfectly straight cuts, etc. if i wanted to but i feel they're a bit boring. and no, i didn't know you hated me but that makes me a sad panda.

Q. "hobostitching"?

A. hobostitching is a type of stitching that's now common among the crustpunk/gutterpunk subcultures for a multitude of reasons. essentially, it's handstitching with a needle and dental floss. usually done in a dropstitch fashion (some call it an "over-under" stitch. sewing dropstitch is different from knitting dropstitch). dental floss, since it's woven nylon, is MUCH stronger than regular thread and since it's waxed, it has a nice stiffness that's natural to it. (since it's waxed, it can't go in a sewing machine either- would gum the whole thing up). also, since it's nylon you can burn the excess at the ends and it hardens. great for knotting ends of seams.

Q. can you make me something? how much do you charge?

A. sure! i try to keep the process pretty personal so i'll need to get some ideas of things that are important in your life, etc. and if you have any patches, etc. that you want me to use, i'll need those mailed to me (or given to me if you're close enough). currently i only charge for materials but if demand picks up i'll need to start charging (a modest amount) of labour as well. the pricing kind of depends on what you want, but i can tell you know that the BDU shirt you see in the next post cost #35USD if i recall. i accept paypal and prefer it, but i'll hesitantly take a check in the mail. or, again, cash is fine if you live close enough to me to hand it to me in person.

Q. are you on Twitter?

A. yep! @SwaPthreads

and the tailor comes clean

2009-01-09T02:01:00.000-05:00

yay for new blogs!

i'll explain more about the title in another post, but this is just a quick announcement saying i finished the most recent project!

photos will follow when i am allowed to! it's a gift for the recipient so when she receives it and gives the approval, i'll post the before and after photos and detail the methods i used for any interested.

and hopefully i'll receive some photos of her modeling it as well!